Six Month Anniversary: What Have We Learned?

Filed under "meaningless milestones," today marks our first six months in the Federal Republic of Germany, at least in the German's eyes (new residents have to register with their local city hall immediately upon moving in, and we touched down on a weekend), which is close enough for us. So, 6 months and 75 blog entries later, what have we learned? What follows is a less-than-comprehensive, off the cuff (this date holds little real significance, and I sort of forgot all about it), rattling off of one couple's expat experiences, in no particular order:

This is a lot harder than we thought: Different culture, different rules, different language. This happens to all expats, and it really is something that you can not adequately prepare for-- even if we moved to Canada, there would be differences. Moving to Germany, a beuaracratic nirvana, where even the most standard forms are in triplicate (seriously) with a vastly different language can be a bit of a mind-mangler.

Embrace the differences: I've come across a number of very unhappy expats here-- Brits, Czechs, and especially Americans-- that just can't get past the fact that this isn't like back home. Really? Who'd a thunk it? You can either roll with the changes (and spoof on them-- feel free to read any of my other blog entries for further evidence) and learn to deal, or simply be consumed by your anger and frustration and be a very miserable person who doesn't have many friends. Your choice. Sure, there's a lot of things I wish these Germans would adopt from North America--being able to buy aspirin from a drugstore (or supermarket or gas station checkout), less red tape for... well, anything, longer shopping hours for the sake of convenience, etc.; but there are things I've seen here that would make total sense in the USA: clean diesel car engines, excellent city planning, public transit to die for, and... shorter shopping hours so you can spend quality time with your loved ones. It's the differences that make a foreign country, well, foreign. Accept them. Celebrate them.

Saying "I understand I probably won't be working" and actually living it are very different: That's more of a personal note than any great revelation, and doesn't need much in the way of explanation. Six months in, and the move is almost complete-- while the apartment still needs work to be done, the intensive language classes are over and the driver's tests are next week. That was enough activity to keep me reasonably busy, but now that this part is over, it is time to move on to the next chapter, and I'm casting around for something to do. I have some ideas, some contacts, and a handful of work projects from the States on tap and will not let boredom get the better of me. But for somebody who has worked all their life to suddenly, voluntarily stop, it can be an odd feeling and a beartrap a lot of expat spouses and partners fall into.

This isn't the USA: Deal with it. While I covered this subject in some detail above, let me just say I've heard stories of folks that rashly took a job here, quickly decided they hated it, and spent their remaining days marking their calendars angrily waiting for their contract to expire, and treating this as a hardship tour. What a bunch of dumbasses.

Make the best of it, and enjoy the experience: There are times when walking to the tram, to the supermarket, to get my hair cut, etc. it just just strikes me: Holy crow, I'm living in a foreign country-- a lot of people would kill for this opportunity. The history, the food, the culture of Europe, and here we are in the middle of it. With a tiny bit of planning, we could be in Paris for dinner, dipping our toes in the fjords of Norway in the evening, or sunning on the beaches of Cape Town the following morning. This is a wonderful opportunity that for some folks, will never come their way. Make the most of it.